“Being as this is a first date, I would of course ask my date about his or her own opinions of, and experiences with the black stuff. I would listen attentively, making approving noises to highlight their great taste. Then I would launch into the following monologue:”
“My living space is 6′ wide and at points vinyl takes up 5’5” of this so, yes, it’s quite a big deal. It started with a flexidisc. To be more specific, a flexidisc of whale songs when I was about 7. Then I started stealing records off my sister’s boyfriend—in particular I was very impressed by a King Crimson bootleg call Earthbound, because the cover was entirely black.
My first records gotten through more honest means were mainly thrash metal, particularly Reign in Blood by Slayer, from which I learnt some exciting new ways to swear, and a few Chicago blues classics by Muddy Waters and Willie Dixon, folks like that. These were all charity-shop purchases, I think—I’ve generally been too skint to buy them new, and they smell more interesting second-hand. Actually my favourite thing of all is when stoned students have drawn on the white inner sleeve jobby—often found in Jimi Hendrix albums. I have an amazing biro portrait of him on one, flanked by angels, with the names of various blues greats appearing in thought bubbles about his head. Groovy.
With vinyl one needs a guru. Fortunately, or unfortunately, considering my diminishing living space—our Reading Studio HQ Silver Street Studios is just down the road from not one but two of the greatest record shops in the world—the Reading Oxfam Music branch and Just Imagination Memorabilia.
Jim at J.I.M. is a local legend—a prolific vinyl only DJ who has been putting on nights since the sixties and, excellently, talks between numbers. He’s the guy who knows which record The The sampled for Mindbomb and he’s the one to go for… I dunno, West Side Story performed by Tomita on the Moog Synthesiser featuring The Papworth Everard Children’s Choir, say. You go into his place, chat for an hour, he plays you the best stuff you never heard, and you walk out with a goodly armful of these funky gems at a fraction of the price you expected, invariably with something he’s thrown in for free.
Paul at Oxfam is so ace, he never comes across as a smartypants DJ but, oh—he so is. You’ll be there, browsing the country section and he’ll quietly slip you some battered old 7” and it’ll be a total game-changer for £1.99. Last one was “Sound of a Bass” by Francois Rabbath, the hippest, smokiest, early’ 60s-slightly-psychedelic-est record for show-off double bass and jazzy drums—and it’s about half as good again because of the scratches. One listen of that and I’m down an alleyway in a gabardine holding a switchblade and doing spy stuff.
These days I try to shuffle past both places with my hands in my pockets—as told, I have space issues, living on a boat as I do. God damn I love that black petrochemical though—it just might be the reason I don’t have a girlfriend…”
—Nigel Firth
Vienna Ditto’s “Ticks” EP is out on 13th May 2016 via Ubiquity Project Recordings.
